First Easter

We had a great first Easter. La's parents came to visit for the weekend and my sister and her boys came over for dinner. We started the day with church, for which when we had no electricity so it was Resurrection Sunday- unplugged. Then we went to a local park for some pictures with the photographer that did HC's newborn shots. She is starting a new product and needed some models and we were happy to be able to sign up late and get squeezed in. We stayed awhile and took some shots ourselves. It was a beautiful day! Dinner was yummy.. followed by a neighborhood stroll and an Easter egg hunt for the boys at dusk. Makes the eggs harder to find when you are 10 and 13 yo.

After thoroughly investigating the basket the Easter bunny brought, she decided she liked it!

Five Months

Oh the joy of watching her grow and still wanting her to stay little.

HC at 5 months:

*Loves to drink water from my glass. Reaches with both hands to grab the glass and pull it to her mouth. It is so cute!

*Says the M-'mu' consonant. Mostly when she is fussing. Like Maaaaaaaaaaaaaa, maaaaaaaaaaaaa instead of whaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaaa. Twice she has said it back to back. mamaaa. Sweet music to our ears. I generally say "i'll be right there' just to hear her say it one more time :)

*Still...loves to nurse, sleeps in our bed, wakes 2-3 times per night (or more), like to be worn in a sling

*Is all about my face, grabbing and squeezing and putting her fingers in my mouth

*Gets tickled and laughs over kisses and kissing sounds (see video below)

*Weighs 16.1lbs and is 25in long

*Likes to watch our shadow when we walk

*Has fun in her jumparoo and excersaucer

*Has grown out of her infant size pre-fold diapers and is on to the next size- regular I think they call it

*As any of you cloth diaper people know, they can be some long diaper changes and she is so patient. Loves her little tiger and dancing frog light on the changing table and just gabs and gabs till we are done.

*Does GREAT!!!!! in her car seat. After 4 months of non stop screaming every time we got in the car, we can finally go places and she doesn't mind it at all. Plays with her toys, sucks her thumb, falls asleep, looks around.. whatever she does.. she ain't cryin'!

Awe

When I look into her eyes and kiss her soft cheeks and smell her sweet smell, I am still in awe that she is mine and I am hers and my heart is filled to overflowing with joy and I am grateful. And I say to her 'I am your mommy!' and she looks at me like she is not surprised. But sometimes I am. The TTC road was so long and painful, it seems so unreal at times. I say to myself 'can you believe that? I am someone's mommy'. I waited my whole life to be a mommy and it feels so good. I still can't believe it sometimes. I have to remind myself this is real. I get to love her forever. And I whisper in her ear from that book. I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be. And she just smiles at me like 'hey, I love you too, why are you getting so teary when you say that?'. And I squeeze her the tightest and never want to let go.

Four Months

Our baby girl at 4 months:

~Has turned the corner and is doing MUCH better in her car seat. Can go for several stops and not cry and even falls asleep

~Giggles when we kiss her neck and gives us back an occasional big open mouth kiss-- LOVE IT!

~Reaches for my water glass and puts her mouth around the rim

~Still loves to nurse

~Still co-sleeping

~Likes being worn in her sling

~Wakes 2-4 times per night, nurses and falls back to sleep

~Enjoy a little time in her excersaucer

~Drools Alot

~Sucks and bites on her hands a large portion of the day

~ Is full of smiles, especially in the morning

~Like the music from a folks singer friend B.ill M.ilford

~Loves to go from lying to sitting to standing while holding our hands and smiles big big when we get to standing and say 'your such a big girl' in our squeeliest voice

~Loves to since and dance and hop around with her moms or grandmas

~Still loves a bath and especially baths with mommy

~Rubs her hands across books when we read

~Passed her brush from her left to right hand

~Loves her tiger and poo poo panda

~Eyelashes are starting to fill in

~Is SO sweet! :)

4 Months

Time really does fly when you're having fun!

Happy Birthday Mama

Happy Birthday, Mama!

I love the way you love me. The gentle kisses and big smiles. Your soft hands and funny stories. Your laugh. You waited a long time for me and me for you.

And you are the best I could have wished for.

I love you, HC

Happy Birthday, La. I love you more each day and thank God that for you. My partner, my friend, the best other mother, love of my life.

I love you. xo

Ali

One year ago today

A year ago today, I stood frozen in the bathroom doorway holding a stick with a faint line and all the hope I could muster - see Fix it and forget it- and the biggest rush of excitement at the possibility. Tonight a year later, I nursed my sweet baby to sleep after a day of smiles and chuckles, talking and reading and soaking in all of her I could. I think some parts of me are still traumatized by our long TTC journey and one loss, but when I look into her sweet eyes all the pain was worth the reward. She is the love of my life. And since it was the first time we had used her donor for an insem, I wouldn't change a thing in getting her here.

At 3 months:
~she laughs at falling toys
~loves to suck her thumb and index finger
~still loves to nurse
~still sleeps with us
~still LOVES her bath and has fallen asleep twice in the bathtub
~loves the foot book
~kicks like crazy to make her toys play music
~drools ALOT
~still not a car seat fan
~wakes up 2-3 times a night or more!
~has discovered her voice in full voice and now does this loud yelling type thing
~can sit in her b*umbo
~ has sweaty feet
~uses her hands more deliberately to grasp toys
~can roll over from belly to back
~likes a full body massage
~is getting a little more hair
~loves kisses and has started opening her mouth to give kisses
~is mommies' sweetest girl

Reflection

Wow....what a year 2009 was. Finally pregnant after 3 years of trying, witnessed our President being sworn in, and our miracle baby was born on October 11, 2009! It has been the most incredible time of our lives. It's hard to believe that HC is now 3 months old. I can still picture the days of Ali contracting, us spending countless hours in the whirlpool tub, and experiencing the most incredible birth...I cry writing this. It's a GIRL, I screamed. She is beautiful and perfect and healthy. She smiles all the time, chuckles from deep in her belly, and screatches at the top of her lungs. She reaches for objects, loves to read her foot book, and loves the bath and the sound of running water. I attribute that to the countless hours laboring in the tub. She loves the sound of water sooooo much that our dear friend let us borrow her sound machine that has pouring rain as an option. That was our miracle for our 3 hour drive when we went to Grandma's for Christmas. She still hates a car seat and semi likes a passy(for about 3 minutes) Ali's first day back to work was last Monday. It was incredibly hard for her and still is. Our schedules work so that I have her on Thursdays and Saturdays and we only needed childcare for Tues. Our good friend S keeps her on Tuesdays, that was her gift to us. We are very blessed! We are still bouncing the idea of Ali quitting work. It would mean selling our home we live in now and moving back into our town home(that is currently for sale or rent) Neither one of us like that option and are praying someone comes along to rent or buy our other home. I told Ali maybe we need to move to Utah and I get job working with J(of KJ and the kids) :)
Life is GOOD in 2010. I pray that it is for your families as well. Tho we may not post often, we follow everyone weekly and we thank you for your continued support on this new journey.

Just A Few

I love getting all the attention! My mommies are promising to post soon. :)

We are still alive

I don't even know where to begin. HC will be 8 weeks tomorrow. The time has flown by. I have almost rewritten our birth story which was so amazing. The short story is...It was a LONG labor and beautiful birth. Just what I hoped for. (not the long part) La was wonderful! I could not have done it with out her. She rubbed my back until I thought her arms would fall off. I spent almost the entire labor in the tub. We planned to deliver there, but ended up getting out the last hour before she was born. The experience made me love what I do even more. More details later.

A short list summary

At 8 wks this we know:

*HC laughs and coos all the time

*Her best time is the morning

*She is a little funky between 6-9pm

*Her favorite thing is still to nurse. In fact she just about does that non stop from 6-9pm.

*She hates her car seat

*She loves her bath

*She is a cat napper and a very light sleeper. Sleeps for the longest on our chest or in her sling. Otherwise it is lay her down, five minutes later pick her up, back to sleep, lay her down, five minutes later etc... you get the picture. Needless to say, I have not gotten anything on my list done that I was going to do on my maternity leave. Big dreams I had.

*She loves to talk with her mama

*LOVES the sound of running water. Hard heavy water

*Falls asleep to the sound of the vacuum

*Loves for us to bounce on the exercise ball and hold her

*Has the strongest eyebrow muscles and furrowed brow you ever did see (except for mine of course) as demonstrated below in her Halloween costume.

*Is the most beautiful, sweetest baby girl and the love of our lives! :-)

A peapod for Halloween

Walking in the Turkey Trot Thanksgiving morning

Trying on her Santa hat

Silly Bean

Winter jammies

Getting ready for bath time

My girl gained 2lbs at her 2week check-up

We are adjusting well as a family. Ali's mom is still here and leaves on Monday. We will fly solo next week. It's a lilltle scary. Our church family has sent meals every other day and they will keep coming thru Nov 12th or so, that has been such a wonderful ministry. Ali and I have been working on our birth story, only to open it today and it has been erased....ugggghhhhh! We will start over when we have some time.

I know you want to know her name, but she will go by H.C. for privacy reasons. We just LOVE her!

Here she is!

We are in love! Thank you for your wonderful comments. It's amazing all the love and support that has been felt by all. We are a little sleep deprived, but both grandmas are here helping us make it through.

Welcome!

I am so sorry for not updating til now...we have been very occupied on getting this miracle here. We had a girl! She weighed 7lbs 8 oz 19 and a quarter inches long, born today at 12:03 a.m.. She is beautiful! Ali will post birth story soon and I promise to get a pic or two on here.

Will today be my birthday?

Ali has been contracting and having bl**dy show. She has been working up to today and unfortunately hurt her back on Tues. while pushing for four hours with her patient and then had a chair slip from under her and she hit the ground. They placed her on the monitor and pea pod is fine. Her back however is killing her! She seems to be having some back labor that causes the pulled muscle to spasm. She has taken many jetted tub baths, got a massage, and is using our good friend's tens unit. She is doing great! I get teary eyed just writing this...not tears of sadness, but complete joy to finally meet this miracle and for my beautiful partner who makes life complete.

So much for the one a day...sorry KJ..

Sympathy pains

Well, the only one giving birth.. is me. Outpatient surgery tomorrow to remove a very stuck 5mm kidney stone. I told Ali, please hold off on labor til Friday and honey I'll be HAPPY to rub your back for you, because if it feels anything like mine has for the past three weeks....it sucks. It's sympathy pains...I just know it!
All your prayers and good energy appreciated.

One a day

As a surprise to KJ (because she basically said we were sucky bloggers) I am posting for the second day in a row... tough love I tell ya...

Completed nursery pics. La did such a great job!

This bookshelf a friend at church made for us.

La made these frames a while back and when we find out what our little surprise is we will hang just one with their picture.

Blessingway

A couple weeks ago, one of our best friends hosted a b.lessing w.ay for me. It was so loving and wonderful! We first came across the idea while we were on a mini vacation at the beach and were reading the The A.rt of B.irthing and in the book it describes this ceremony that many cultures do to bless a new mother and share stories of motherhood and birth and just really lift up and honor this new journey. Our friend S took the idea and ran with it, searching and reading all she could find on them. They were started in the native american culture. I gave S a list of women that were special to me for various reasons and in the invitation she asked them to bring a bead for my birthing necklace and a poem, verse, song (the song playing now is one that a friend brought to share) or words of wisdom about mothering and/or birth. We started the evening with each person telling how we knew each other and what was special about their relationship to me and then a short meditation to center and quiet us from our day. During the meditation we were asked to close our eyes and picture our hands and the hands of our mothers and all those that had mothered us in our lives. The use of our hands for both good and ill in the world. We placed our hand over our heart and over our wombs, both the full ones (three of us are pregnant) and the empty or where they used to be for the mom's who no longer have theirs. We were asked to treasure the gift of being female and mother and all that that brings and means.

We then went around the room and each person shared the bead they had brought and why they had chosen it and then their selected or written words of encouragement and love for me as a person, woman, friend, sister, mother. It was one of the most special times in my life. One of those times like our wedding when I wanted to start all over when it was done. Just stop the clock and be there a while. We laughed and cried. And felt such a connection to one another, it took me days to be able to wrap words around my feelings. I was given a beautiful gift that night that I will always cherish. Above is a picture of the necklace that we made from the beads. Each one has a special meaning to me both because of who gave it and also why it was special to them for me.

After we shared a meal, each person was given a candle to keep lit while I am in labor. I said I hope these are those short 4 hour burning candles... and they assured me they were :-)

Just a liitle update

No ,we're not in labor. Ali is 1cm dilated and 60% efface. Looks like we'll go more around her due date(Oct.6) but then again her family goes late. We have bag packed, pea pods clothes, CD's, car seat installed...are we missing anything? We don't seem to have much time to post, but I promise to keep you updated.



And go give a BIG FAT CONGRATS TO http://mommiesinthemaking.blogspot.com/

Belly Shot Proofs

Ok as promised...here are a few of our favorites. Don't pay attention to the blue ribbon...we played around with pink and blue and will have it changed(gotta love photoshop) once pea pod comes.

Holy Bagoly!

35 weeks...we're almost there! It has been crazy fun around here. We had our last baby shower on Sun and finished up our last CB class last night. I feel like this is now the home stretch to finish up last minute projects. We have seen some of our belly proofs, not all, but I will post them once we receive our CD. All in all I think they turned out good considering it felt like 100 degrees . Our good friend built the baby's book shelf, so now we need to tidy up loose ends in the nursery and I promise to post a final picture. At our shower on Sunday a friend gave us a CD w/ a song she had written and recorded for us and our baby called "Worth the Wait". We were so touched and still cry every time we play it. If I could figure out how to get it on here, I would. It is so beautiful. If anyone knows how... let me know.

Our lives are truly about ready to change. I get a little anxious and scared, mostly about the birth and just wanting everything to be okay. We have waited soooo long for this miracle...it makes me all teary eyed just thinking about it.

Dilemma #99

Need some advice. I have been pondering on what to do about our baby's last name. My last name has 9 letters and Ali's has 5. Do we hyphenate our last name to give the kid 14 letters or use both of our names, Ali's falling last, un-hyphenated? Let us know what your family did.


On another note, we had belly shots taken today by a local photographer. It was hot as hell even tho we started at 9am this morning. We are both unsure of how they will turn out since I was sweating by 9:15. Our photographer has assured us..no worries...that's what photo shop is for.
Ali was beautiful and so was her belly. We can't wait for the proofs!

Baby Shower

We had my work shower last Wednesday. It was so much fun. I got to see a couple people that used to work with us and I don't get to visit with much anymore. The food theme was Italian- our favorite. We played three games. I LOVE games and my favorite is p.ictionary. So of course we played L&D p.ictionary. There were three non-nursing people plus La there and they were all speechless as we drew things like perineal massage and bloody show. It was great! Pics below. Anyone care to make any guesses??

This was a really cool gift I thought. It is a bush that blooms in October when the baby is due and there were all these little tags attached with wishes for us and the baby. And the card was implanted with seeds, so you plant the card and flowers grow. Now that is recycling. All cards should be like that!

My sister surprised us with a video camera. We are so excited! Now we can make movies of our little peapod.

We are have belly pictures done Thursday. Trying to figure out what to wear and what props to use. One group from my work got together and gave us a first year baby plan from one of our local photographers. Very cool gift!

33 weeks tomorrow! wow! We have another CB class tonight. Those have been interesting. If I had to do it again, I would have been kept quiet about what I do when that question was asked. It is a hard line to walk when people ask me at break or after class.. 'does my doc/midwife to this or that?' I want them to have all the information, but it puts me in an awkward place. And then one person phrased a question last week with a preface ' no offense to you' talking to me and then asked her question to the instructor. None taken, believe me. Tonight is supposed to be more 'floor/pillow work', so I'm looking forward to that.

31 weeks

Alright... here it is. Thanks to KJ for not keeping silent any longer....finally a belly shot and a piece of the nursery all in one. La is still working on some canvas prints for the walls but behind me you see the tree she painted. We'll post a completed pic when it is done. And here I am just home from a 12 hour shift... 31wks ! today!! :-)

30 week milestones

This week we started our cbc. We were the token lesbians. There are 8 couples and one of the couples is taking this class for the second time. Oh how I wish they weren't. Have you ever encountered that one person who wants to make a comment on everything.....Ali at one point said "I did not pay all this money to hear him talk the entire class" Uggghhhh and for 6 weeks. The instructor is too sweet and probably wouldn't say anything, but we left there wondering if this is how he will be the rest of the next 5 weeks. What could he possibly learn this time that he didn't learn the first?

Today was our 30 weeek US....pea pod was not as active so we didn't get any good shots, not to mention I think our tech was new. The good news is the fibroid isn't affecting the growth of the baby...weight about 3lbs 9oz seems, fibroid seems to have disappeared. Dr H does want to ck back in 6 weeks to make sure.

We have had one baby shower that was given by my mom and have the other two scheduled Aug 12th and 30th. We are looking forward to that. I love to scan the items....it gets me in trouble sometimes when I seem to wonder off scanning random toys.....hee hee.

Nursery is 80% complete. I did a mural of a tree, so that took some time. A friend is making bookshelves for us...we have tons of books that Ali has accumulated over the years. I promise to take pictures when it's all done.

Baby is active all the time....it makes mommy very happy. Oh, and the US tech said she saw hair. I saw it too! Ali is a little unsure since she was bald til she was 3. I have to remind her about her recent dream, the baby had a head full of dark hair and blue eyes. I am tickled pink/blue to meet this tiny human....it makes my heart sing with joy!

We celebrated our 10 year anniversary on Sun. (Dating anniversary that is...I tell Ali we will always celebrate this one too, since this is how we got to the wedding one)

Thanks for following our journey, even though we haven't updated as often as we would have liked. If you stopped by...play our game over to the right..would love to see your guesses.

Calling all cloth diaper families

I am working on our registry and trying to figure out many cloth diapers we need.

Right now I have:

15 F*uzzy.buns (these go from small to large in one diaper)

4 Th*irsties Fab Fitted (size small)

15 B*um G*enius 3.0 (these also go from small to large in one diaper)

That doesn't seem like enough. The plan is to wash diapers every other day. Not sure how many inserts we need either. Anybody have advice or another brand they just LOVE and suggest we try?